[AtomCell]

Nothing I say will make it better but, learn to meditate. Honestly. Search for Samadhi - yogic practrice. This is the only source you will find peace in your life: Inside yourself. Your children, wife, are not your own. Sorry to say it like that but its the dead truth. Nobody owns anybody, not even our children. The sad honest truth is, you are not alone. I've been there. There are others too. I was there as a child and I was there as an adult. Its taken me years, to get over the losses and the sacrifices I made just make my stomach wrech into the worst pain I have ever felt. At least the kids are yours. And as long as you can connect as an adult with them, everything will be fine. You do not need the wife, you deserve better. She has some issues internally and like most people, seek to find resolve externally. Meaning thru substance, material, possessions. Living a life in need is a life of suffering.

What my experience taught me is, you cannot trust anyone. I have no friends, no family, not worth having at least. The toxicity and stench is undeniable, so I HAD to leave... for my own health. I had to learn that the whole time I was putting her and the kids first, was not the way. That is simply an unsustainable relationship dynamic. Most of our culture, is trained to be employees, and sheep... we do as others do. It is time YOU, wake up. FOR YOU. Im sorry, there is just no easy way to walk this path, no easy way to identify it for another, no easy way to say it to his or her face. This is mostly why I have very little contact with people now. I feel for you. I really do, my heart has been broken for goin on twenty years now and I still struggle to let go, because of how much I love... how much I loved our family, our children (so I thought), how happy I was to make the sacrifices to put them first, because THEY, were my point of joy. My source of life. The worst thing is, when society and others, moch you and tell ya your a dead beat piece of shit daddy... who can't please his wife... Nothing hurts more than the accusations that are NOT true.

Best thing for you is to get a few books, move to a location where you are alone, and stay single for at LEAST 5 years before dating again!!! I cannot stress that enough!
Some good read are:

meditation and the ART of dying
the power of now
becoming supernaturual
and start your own research AND practice into
wikipedia Samadhi

Start to learn about the law of attraction and your abilty to influence Quanta, attract what you desire. I encourage and CHALLENGE you to humbly do your homework into changing the way you think, control your thinking, control your feeling, and seek your god given destiny.

I have had it all, forever, Ive had enough. I emplore you to have your identity revealed to you, thru self discovery. So you can start to achieve your destiny. Your TRUE purpose here on planet Earth.

'Learn to let go of what you cannot'

Best thing I have for you man is to learn to meditate and you will INSTANTLY remove that feeling in your dantian, your gut. that feeling that makes you sick and want to puke or jump off a bridge. I don't know how to teach you, but I can tell you it has to do with your mind and mind body connection, simply being at peace and rest, and focusing on your breathing... deep, slow, in and out. when your mind enters pre rem, and you are mind awake body asleep, you will have powerful experiences, information channeling to you. You will learn to attract it, as it is all around you. When you can attract it, you will heal from all this. Best way I can describe. Your mind is liek a radio transeiver... hone in your freq... learn about charaks, the dantian, and root chakra and Aim to have a GROUNDING experience. Nothing else has helped me reaslize my source, or nature. Nothing else helped me instantly feel better. Nothing else helped me to realize the truth. That the past, nor future exist, and all you have is now. So learn to be in that moment. Im sorry brother. for your loss and suffering. I really truly am. I can relate all too well.

[LawDogUSA]

Nothing I say will make it better but, learn to meditate. Honestly. Search for Samadhi - yogic practrice. This is the only source you will find peace in your life: Inside yourself. Your children, wife, are not your own. Sorry to say it like that but its the dead truth. Nobody owns anybody, not even our children. The sad honest truth is, you are not alone. I've been there. There are others too. I was there as a child and I was there as an adult. Its taken me years, to get over the losses and the sacrifices I made just make my stomach wrech into the worst pain I have ever felt. At least the kids are yours. And as long as you can connect as an adult with them, everything will be fine. You do not need the wife, you deserve better. She has some issues internally and like most people, seek to find resolve externally. Meaning thru substance, material, possessions. Living a life in need is a life of suffering.

What my experience taught me is, you cannot trust anyone. I have no friends, no family, not worth having at least. The toxicity and stench is undeniable, so I HAD to leave... for my own health. I had to learn that the whole time I was putting her and the kids first, was not the way. That is simply an unsustainable relationship dynamic. Most of our culture, is trained to be employees, and sheep... we do as others do. It is time YOU, wake up. FOR YOU. Im sorry, there is just no easy way to walk this path, no easy way to identify it for another, no easy way to say it to his or her face. This is mostly why I have very little contact with people now. I feel for you. I really do, my heart has been broken for goin on twenty years now and I still struggle to let go, because of how much I love... how much I loved our family, our children (so I thought), how happy I was to make the sacrifices to put them first, because THEY, were my point of joy. My source of life. The worst thing is, when society and others, moch you and tell ya your a dead beat piece of shit daddy... who can't please his wife... Nothing hurts more than the accusations that are NOT true.

Best thing for you is to get a few books, move to a location where you are alone, and stay single for at LEAST 5 years before dating again!!! I cannot stress that enough!
Some good read are:

meditation and the ART of dying
the power of now
becoming supernaturual
and start your own research AND practice into
wikipedia Samadhi

Start to learn about the law of attraction and your abilty to influence Quanta, attract what you desire. I encourage and CHALLENGE you to humbly do your homework into changing the way you think, control your thinking, control your feeling, and seek your god given destiny.

I have had it all, forever, Ive had enough. I emplore you to have your identity revealed to you, thru self discovery. So you can start to achieve your destiny. Your TRUE purpose here on planet Earth.

'Learn to let go of what you cannot'

Best thing I have for you man is to learn to meditate and you will INSTANTLY remove that feeling in your dantian, your gut. that feeling that makes you sick and want to puke or jump off a bridge. I don't know how to teach you, but I can tell you it has to do with your mind and mind body connection, simply being at peace and rest, and focusing on your breathing... deep, slow, in and out. when your mind enters pre rem, and you are mind awake body asleep, you will have powerful experiences, information channeling to you. You will learn to attract it, as it is all around you. When you can attract it, you will heal from all this. Best way I can describe. Your mind is liek a radio transeiver... hone in your freq... learn about charaks, the dantian, and root chakra and Aim to have a GROUNDING experience. Nothing else has helped me reaslize my source, or nature. Nothing else helped me instantly feel better. Nothing else helped me to realize the truth. That the past, nor future exist, and all you have is now. So learn to be in that moment. Im sorry brother. for your loss and suffering. I really truly am. I can relate all too well.

My goodness, I can't stop the tears in my eyes. Thank you so much brother! My life has just crumbled worse than ever before, right before you wrote this. It could not have come at a better time. It hurts and pains me to hear you even apologize, but part of my heart lights up again knowing I'm not alone and you held on, and are now here to tell me and guide me in such a way. I wish I could take your pain away and this didn't happen to you or me, but we all know this is a cruel world sometimes. I can promise you this, I will do everything you listed and said, cause I know I will find "my" way again. And the time to focus on me is almost at hand. But first this needs to be said.....

I don't care about the the money, pensions, things, that are stolen, destroyed, or gone. I began reaching out to members here again for some type of help or knowledge to guide me to do it, and it's for these reasons:. Christmas time came and I was able to meet up with my son, who is 8 now, at the library. I had to borrow money to get my son gifts, we didn't have much time and it was a library. My son left with his Mother and her sister in law, two very cruel women, I was watching them leave and they pulled up to a dumpster and took the gifts out and threw them away. I could hear him scream and cry, to no care by them, as they continued to drive away. Paperwork was filed, I cannot afford an attorney, and the motion still sits because of Covid. Then the day after Father's day of this year, I'm on a Court mandated video call with my son (my daughters are 17, 18). My soon to be ex wants him off the phone, we get 2 hours, and he knows. He is acknowledging her slightly but wants to stay on with me. Long story short, after several threats, that's she is going to leave, she shuts the lights off, leaving him in the dark and shuts the bedroom door locking him in. I got him though, got him to be brave as I'm call 911 and he's using his iPad for light. Right when he gets to the door, she jumps out, knocks the iPad out of his hands and begins to spank him. Police get there, and they are gone, eventually they are tracked down only to be told it was discipline because he wouldn't listen and I was making him disobey. Um, I'm a little smarter than that, I got most of it on camera. And here we sit waiting for Court, but no more. I have been around the Court system enough and know how to file a motion. And I have a few going in this week. But, brothers and sisters, if there are any willing to help with some Justice, she did fill 40 grand up in CC and took her name off, stold one pension, and filed false papers in the other, to the point my credit is shot and I have no money in then account and make 1,000 as a disabled Veteran/Police Officer. A lot of you are super skilled, to the point I have called you modern day superheroes, if there's any help, assistance, justice, or anything you can assist me with, I will be eternally grateful. I will do what was written here also, I will do it tons tee. I fought for freedom and I did my job the right way. I do have a Purple Heart and a Medal of Honor. I have to finish this fight for my son, and pray the ex gets help. I am his Father and as broken as I am, I have to stand up for what's right. I told the ex she can take me out in a field and beat me with a bat, just don't take it out on our children. I have not seen my kids on any holiday, birthday, break in over a year. I missed both of my son's birthdays because she refused to let me go. I thank you all. All honor and respect to you! And a very special thanks to the original poster. Know , I will do this for you and with you. And I am eternally grateful for taking the time to show me I'm not alone and more importantly, how to heal. Bless you all, I hope some can help.


Respectfully Submitted,

G

[duremars]

I am so sorry that you have to go through this! Divorce can happen pretty often and it's so sad to see that many people are breaking up. I am fortunate enough to have a happy marriage and I am very grateful for my wife. Some of my friends are not in the same situation. My best friend has recently gone through a divorce and he had to split his assets with his wife. I've wanted to help him so I've started to look for some help online. I've found this [redacted] and I've decided to tell him about it. There isn't much to do, so I am hoping the best for him and hopefully, things will eventually be solved out

[mothered]

I've spoken with the OP over PM, and he's certainly made a lot of progress since the date of this thread.

Well done, keep moving forward and this will soon be a thing of the past.

[historybuff]

Nothing I say will make it better but, learn to meditate. Honestly. Search for Samadhi - yogic practrice. This is the only source you will find peace in your life: Inside yourself. Your children, wife, are not your own. Sorry to say it like that but its the dead truth. Nobody owns anybody, not even our children. The sad honest truth is, you are not alone. I've been there. There are others too. I was there as a child and I was there as an adult. Its taken me years, to get over the losses and the sacrifices I made just make my stomach wrech into the worst pain I have ever felt. At least the kids are yours. And as long as you can connect as an adult with them, everything will be fine. You do not need the wife, you deserve better. She has some issues internally and like most people, seek to find resolve externally. Meaning thru substance, material, possessions. Living a life in need is a life of suffering.

What my experience taught me is, you cannot trust anyone. I have no friends, no family, not worth having at least. The toxicity and stench is undeniable, so I HAD to leave... for my own health. I had to learn that the whole time I was putting her and the kids first, was not the way. That is simply an unsustainable relationship dynamic. Most of our culture, is trained to be employees, and sheep... we do as others do. It is time YOU, wake up. FOR YOU. Im sorry, there is just no easy way to walk this path, no easy way to identify it for another, no easy way to say it to his or her face. This is mostly why I have very little contact with people now. I feel for you. I really do, my heart has been broken for goin on twenty years now and I still struggle to let go, because of how much I love... how much I loved our family, our children (so I thought), how happy I was to make the sacrifices to put them first, because THEY, were my point of joy. My source of life. The worst thing is, when society and others, moch you and tell ya your a dead beat piece of shit daddy... who can't please his wife... Nothing hurts more than the accusations that are NOT true.

Best thing for you is to get a few books, move to a location where you are alone, and stay single for at LEAST 5 years before dating again!!! I cannot stress that enough!
Some good read are:

meditation and the ART of dying
the power of now
becoming supernaturual
and start your own research AND practice into
wikipedia Samadhi

Start to learn about the law of attraction and your abilty to influence Quanta, attract what you desire. I encourage and CHALLENGE you to humbly do your homework into changing the way you think, control your thinking, control your feeling, and seek your god given destiny.

I have had it all, forever, Ive had enough. I emplore you to have your identity revealed to you, thru self discovery. So you can start to achieve your destiny. Your TRUE purpose here on planet Earth.

'Learn to let go of what you cannot'

Best thing I have for you man is to learn to meditate and you will INSTANTLY remove that feeling in your dantian, your gut. that feeling that makes you sick and want to puke or jump off a bridge. I don't know how to teach you, but I can tell you it has to do with your mind and mind body connection, simply being at peace and rest, and focusing on your breathing... deep, slow, in and out. when your mind enters pre rem, and you are mind awake body asleep, you will have powerful experiences, information channeling to you. You will learn to attract it, as it is all around you. When you can attract it, you will heal from all this. Best way I can describe. Your mind is liek a radio transeiver... hone in your freq... learn about charaks, the dantian, and root chakra and Aim to have a GROUNDING experience. Nothing else has helped me reaslize my source, or nature. Nothing else helped me instantly feel better. Nothing else helped me to realize the truth. That the past, nor future exist, and all you have is now. So learn to be in that moment. Im sorry brother. for your loss and suffering. I really truly am. I can relate all too well.

My goodness, I can't stop the tears in my eyes.  Thank you so much brother!  My life has just crumbled worse than ever before, right before you wrote this.  It could not have come at a better time. It hurts and pains me to hear you even apologize, but part of my heart lights up again knowing I'm not alone and you held on, and are now here to tell me and guide me in such a way.  I wish I could take your pain away and this didn't happen to you or me, but we all know this is a cruel world sometimes.  I can promise you this, I will do everything you listed and said, cause I know I will find "my" way again.  And the time to focus on me is almost at hand.  But first this needs to be said.....

I don't care about the the money, pensions, things, that are stolen, destroyed, or gone.  I began reaching out to members here again for some type of help or knowledge to guide me to do it, and it's for these reasons:. Christmas time came and I was able to meet up with my son, who is 8 now, at the library.  I had to borrow money to get my son gifts, we didn't have much time and it was a library.  My son left with his Mother and her sister in law, two very cruel women, I was watching them leave and they pulled up to a dumpster and took the gifts out and threw them away.  I could hear him scream and cry, to no care by them, as they continued to drive away.  Paperwork was filed, I cannot afford an attorney, and the motion still sits because of Covid.  Then the day after Father's day of this year, I'm on a Court mandated video call with my son (my daughters are 17, 18).  My soon to be ex wants him off the phone, we get 2 hours, and he knows.  He is acknowledging her slightly but wants to stay on with me.  Long story short, after several threats, that's she is going to leave, she shuts the lights off, leaving him in the dark and shuts the bedroom door locking him in.  I got him though, got him to be brave as I'm call 911 and he's using his iPad for light.  Right when he gets to the door, she jumps out, knocks the iPad out of his hands and begins to spank him.  Police get there, and they are gone, eventually they are tracked down only to be told it was discipline because he wouldn't listen and I was making him disobey.  Um, I'm a little smarter than that, I got most of it on camera.  And here we sit waiting for Court, but no more.  I have been around the Court system enough and know how to file a motion.  And I have a few going in this week.  But, brothers and sisters, if there are any willing to help with some Justice, she did fill 40 grand up in CC and took her name off, stold one pension, and filed false papers in the other, to the point my I EDITED THIS BECAUSE IT CENSORED CRED?IT is shot and I have no money in then account and make 1,000 as a disabled Veteran/Police Officer.  A lot of you are super skilled, to the point I have called you modern day superheroes, if there's any help, assistance, justice, or anything you can assist me with, I will be eternally grateful.  I will do what was written here also, I will do it tons tee.  I fought for freedom and I did my job the right way.  I do have a Purple Heart and a Medal of Honor.  I have to finish this fight for my son, and pray the ex gets help.  I am his Father and as broken as I am, I have to stand up for what's right.  I told the ex she can take me out in a field and beat me with a bat, just don't take it out on our children.  I have not seen my kids on any holiday, birthday, break in over a year.  I missed both of my son's birthdays because she refused to let me go.  I thank you all.  All honor and respect to you!  And a very special thanks to the original poster.  Know , I will do this for you and with you.  And I am eternally grateful for taking the time to show me I'm not alone and more importantly, how to heal.  Bless you all, I hope some can help.


Respectfully Submitted,

G

HI, i am really sorry that this happened to you. I just have one question, you said that you had the medal of honor? May i ask your name since there are not that many living receipients? Also, since you mentioned that you were a veteran, I would call the tunnels to towers foundation. They help veterans like yourself, often buying them new homes. ALso, the wounded warrior foundation comes to mind. I know this might sound horrible, but im sure that you could find a pawnshop owner who would pay you cash for the medal. I know of one that sold for around 10,000 usd. You could sign a contract with him stating that you can buy it again, and the pawn shop owner has to wait a certain time to be able to sell the medal (10 years or so) tell him you will buy it back at 15k within a few years. You take that 10k from the sale of the medal, you hire a lawyer, and you make that bitch pay. You explain everything, you show them recordings, whatever it takes. Make it so that YOU get child support. She said that you made your son disobey? Sue her for slander. Did she lie about you to other people like the sister in law, who then spoke badly about you? Sue that bitch too for slander.  Just my 2 cents, god bless you and your kids, and fuck that bitch.

[LawDogUSA]

Hey, much appreciation for your post. And a massive shout of thanks to Mothered and everyone else who stood by me and still do. I was about ready to blow, it got worse and worse. We are 2 years in and finally making what I would say progress. It will be over by mid June, hopefully sooner. I have to say, it got worse, and still does. Found out yesterday by going through over a 1000 pages of bank statements, she pocketed away thousands and spent even more. She filed for my disability benefits in her own name and I ended up paying 90% of it back without knowing. Opened a credit card in my name and ran that one up to 10g.

Well here I am, positive and somewhat happy, and I'm back doing what I do. I'm focused on this, I have a friend of 20 years who is my acting lawyer, but not on Court file, so I'm not paying a fortune. I forced her hand and she had to get her own lawyer. My ex can come across believable, but with the patience I have and the excellent support and advice from here, her true colors showed immediately. She is relentless and not afraid to use our 3 children as pawns. Just to tell you she out of the blue set up a visit with all 3 of my kids at my Mom's house, where I stay to assist my elderly mother in her tiny place. They live in my townhouse, 1 min away. My kids came and it was a sabatoge mission. My 2 oldest came in and we're sending pics and videos back to her and she had them take 6 grand worth of stuff, not just mine, but my Mother's too. My oldest loaded her car up in the course of a few hours and left. I have security cameras, but knew things were suspicious, but I had all 3 of my kids together at once in almost 2 years. Started noticing the stuff missing and the the Ex presents the pics and videos to her lawyer. But I had forwarded my lawyer what I knew already was missing, then the videos from security. Her lawyer was stunned and said it was a visit with children and she had commited numerous crimes. We had them and it still continues, with violating Court Orders and having melt downs.

So, back to me. Yes I am a Veteran and I was in Law Enforcement for combined 30 years. I'm trying to be coy here cause I do what I do here and will always be loyal here. But even stating who I was and what I did, didn't necessarily sit well with me because I didn't want to be shunned or ignored. I'm no rat, I'm loyal, I have done a lot of things that weren't right or on the books. If you did run into military or law enforcement, I was definitely the guy you wanted. I care about people immensely, putting them in jail or writing a ticket isn't a game I played. I helped a ton, and always felt a duty to do what was right according to God's Law, not man's. When times got tough and our cities wanted more money, they raised quotas and fines. I wrote less tickets then, and they didn't like it, but I'm not robbing the people I swore to protect to fatten the politicians greed for money. I have a million stories and if you want them, ask, I'll tell you. Good or bad. I needed a ride not to long ago and I spoke with a guy I have known for over 20 years, he's much younger and was the kid the Cops picked on. He had no Dad, was a great kid and took him under my wing, he's a grown man now, great with his kids, not his baby's mommas, but solid. He gives me a ride and we get back, he gets out and tears in his eyes says if it wasn't for me he would have been dead or in jail. Thanked me. No, that's my honor, how I roll, he doesn't need to thank me, it's just me. I wasn't letting him fall.

So I beat the hell out of my body. During my career, I received the Medal of Honor for Law Enforcement, Purple Heart, Life Saving, Silver Star, and I'm in the Police Hall of Fame. People recognized what I did, and how I did it, so that's how I got the Medals. You want proof I will get it to you. I know better than to come here and BS, and I'm not bragging either. Someone has to do these things, I did it a lot my way, which is the right way (mostly). I'm not perfect and have my faults. And liked Mothered and many others have said, I control the future and the clouds will clear.

It's happening now, I'm on the right track, parts of my body may be shot, but my mind is better than ever. Love computers and those things, and so does my son. I see him every other weekend now, but I'm not allowed, according to the Ex, to speak with him during the other days, violation of Court Order too. Monday is our first conference in settlement.

So I got myself settled and built cases against her with the evidence. It's great when you can get screenshots from her phone and computer, showing the control she had over credit cards and bank accounts. And how she had alerts if I used the 2 cards I knew about. Was able to prove she removed her name from the two credit cards she had made me primary, you can't do that. Got the credit card companies to admit it too. Some emails showing she obtained storage units prior to this all happening, she has 8 other credit cards in her name. My credit score went down because of this, but working at that. It's amazing what you can learn to do in the right places. Putting together the necessary evidence.

I don't want people to think it's a guy bitching about his ex. I was with her for 25 years and took very good care of her. She has a very good sales job and makes 5 times what I do now. She is brutal, and I think it's past vindictive, it's mental. So she can't afford to pay me back or even half the debt, so I'm going for my townhouse, and for my son to stay there to stop moving him from school to school. And we co-parent. She won't communicate with me unless it's thru a Court text app, she only answers when she wants, and has numerous meltdowns on there with stunning things a Judge would not tolerate. So going for my house, son (50-50) if she can if not, get help for whatever is wrong, keep what I have and she can keep her stuff. Give me back what she can. I got a lot of my debt lowers and I will be eligible for hardship and federal aide. And she has to pay me maintenance. It's what's right. I was a stay at home day for 80% of my son's life. My girls are over 18. And won't face me after the lies and thefts, it's behind me. I just want to be their Dad. My broke ass was even able to get my oldest a PS5 when they just came out in November, a bundle pack too. Oh the things I learned to do, and can't wait to keep going. Especially since my son wants in on Computers too. Happy Dad

I won't sell my medals, I sold a lot of my gear. I apologize if anyone thought my Medal of Honor was from the military, though I have medals from that time of my life. But like the Boss and most here say, that's the past, I want the future. SE is good and my lucky ass found a new woman over a decade younger, loyal as hell, and stuck by me through this, never married and no kids, beautiful too. And I think she can right a book on SE, and she doesn't even know what SE means. Just how we roll if possible. We learn and do. We enjoy life, a little partying here and there, and looking forward to one massive celebration when this divorce ends.

I write this cause one, I can't shut up, but to say thank you to everyone. Right here from my heart, thank you. Also, to learn, and for others to learn, cause this has been the hardest thing I have ever done and dealt with. And yes my ex has done everything to try and destroy my career and life. If you have a significant other, obviously trust is huge, but keep your own finances. Treat your other half well, don't play games, you want out, make the decision and go, move on in life. Patience and hope, they are hard, but work. Find happiness and put good people around you, even on the computer. There will be another day.

One other note, you can ask me anything you want, I will answer. I will help if I can. You ever need a, let's say, a report of some kind, like a Police Report, I can help with that, I'm a good writer, and will make sure you get what you need.

I appreciate the response to brother. I will fight till it's right and just. You want proof, not a prob. Don't think I will just throw out my name, but we know there's ways to find out. I'm not hiding anything either.

Peace and happiness to you all! Hit me up for anything.

With the upmost respect and gratitude,

G

[One5212]

My Friend, I am sorry to hear what your going through. I know its hard to believe, but I went through a nightmare worse than what you have explained. I not going to get into details, but you must remember that no matter how bad it gets, there is someone that has it worse. I would suggest you just move on and concentrate on you. I know this is not much help but you will get through this.......keep your head up.

[scargo]

my suggestion make a harem,
i am serious tought, sex always good

[Defeat]

Hey, much appreciation for your post.  And a massive shout of thanks to Mothered and everyone else who stood by me and still do.  I was about ready to blow, it got worse and worse.  We are 2 years in and finally making what I would say progress.  It will be over by mid June, hopefully sooner.  I have to say, it got worse, and still does.  Found out yesterday by going through over a 1000 pages of bank statements, she pocketed away thousands and spent even more.  She filed for my disability benefits in her own name and I ended up paying 90% of it back without knowing.  Opened a credit card in my name and ran that one up to 10g.

Well here I am, positive and somewhat happy, and I'm back doing what I do.  I'm focused on this, I have a friend of 20 years who is my acting lawyer, but not on Court file, so I'm not paying a fortune.  I forced her hand and she had to get her own lawyer.  My ex can come across believable, but with the patience I have and the excellent support and advice from here, her true colors showed immediately.  She is relentless and not afraid to use our 3 children as pawns.  Just to tell you she out of the blue set up a visit with all 3 of my kids at my Mom's house, where I stay to assist my elderly mother in her tiny place.  They live in my townhouse, 1 min away.  My kids came and it was a sabatoge mission.  My 2 oldest came in and we're sending pics and videos back to her and she had them take 6 grand worth of stuff, not just mine, but my Mother's too.  My oldest loaded her car up in the course of a few hours and left. I have security cameras, but knew things were suspicious, but I had all 3 of my kids together at once in almost 2 years.  Started noticing the stuff missing and the the Ex presents the pics and videos to her lawyer.  But I had forwarded my lawyer what I knew already was missing, then the videos from security.  Her lawyer was stunned and said it was a visit with children and she had commited numerous crimes.  We had them and it still continues, with violating Court Orders and having melt downs.

So, back to me.  Yes I am a Veteran and I was in Law Enforcement for combined 30 years.  I'm trying to be coy here cause I do what I do here and will always be loyal here.  But even stating who I was and what I did, didn't necessarily sit well with me because I didn't want to be shunned or ignored.  I'm no rat, I'm loyal, I have done a lot of things that weren't right or on the books.  If you did run into military or law enforcement, I was definitely the guy you wanted.  I care about people immensely, putting them in jail or writing a ticket isn't a game I played.  I helped a ton, and always felt a duty to do what was right according to God's Law, not man's.  When times got tough and our cities wanted more money, they raised quotas and fines.  I wrote less tickets then, and they didn't like it, but I'm not robbing the people I swore to protect to fatten the politicians greed for money.  I have a million stories and if you want them, ask, I'll tell you.  Good or bad.  I needed a ride not to long ago and I spoke with a guy I have known for over 20 years, he's much younger and was the kid the Cops picked on.  He had no Dad, was a great kid and took him under my wing, he's a grown man now, great with his kids, not his baby's mommas, but solid.  He gives me a ride and we get back, he gets out and tears in his eyes says if it wasn't for me he would have been dead or in jail.  Thanked me.  No, that's my honor, how I roll, he doesn't need to thank me, it's just me.  I wasn't letting him fall.

So I beat the hell out of my body.  During my career, I received the Medal of Honor for Law Enforcement, Purple Heart, Life Saving, Silver Star, and I'm in the Police Hall of Fame.  People recognized what I did, and how I did it, so that's how I got the Medals.  You want proof I will get it to you.  I know better than to come here and BS, and I'm not bragging either.  Someone has to do these things, I did it a lot my way, which is the right way (mostly).  I'm not perfect and have my faults.  And liked Mothered and many others have said, I control the future and the clouds will clear.

It's happening now, I'm on the right track, parts of my body may be shot, but my mind is better than ever.  Love computers and those things, and so does my son.  I see him every other weekend now, but I'm not allowed, according to the Ex, to speak with him during the other days, violation of Court Order too.  Monday is our first conference in settlement. 

So I got myself settled and built cases against her with the evidence.  It's great when you can get screenshots from her phone and computer, showing the control she had over credit cards and bank accounts.  And how she had alerts if I used the 2 cards I knew about.  Was able to prove she removed her name from the two credit cards she had made me primary, you can't do that.  Got the credit card companies to admit it too.  Some emails showing she obtained storage units prior to this all happening, she has 8 other credit cards in her name.  My credit score went down because of this, but working at that.  It's amazing what you can learn to do in the right places.  Putting together the necessary evidence.

I don't want people to think it's a guy bitching about his ex.  I was with her for 25 years and took very good care of her.  She has a very good sales job and makes 5 times what I do now.  She is brutal, and I think it's past vindictive, it's mental.  So she can't afford to pay me back or even half the debt, so I'm going for my townhouse, and for my son to stay there to stop moving him from school to school.  And we co-parent.  She won't communicate with me unless it's thru a Court text app, she only answers when she wants, and has numerous meltdowns on there with stunning things a Judge would not tolerate.  So going for my house, son (50-50) if she can if not, get help for whatever is wrong, keep what I have and she can keep her stuff.  Give me back what she can.  I got a lot of my debt lowers and I will be eligible for hardship and federal aide.  And she has to pay me maintenance.  It's what's right.  I was a stay at home day for 80% of my son's life.  My girls are over 18.  And won't face me after the lies and thefts, it's behind me.  I just want to be their Dad.  My broke ass was even able to get my oldest a PS5 when they just came out in November, a bundle pack too.  Oh the things I learned to do, and can't wait to keep going.  Especially since my son wants in on Computers too.  Happy Dad

I won't sell my medals, I sold a lot of my gear.  I apologize if anyone thought my Medal of Honor was from the military, though I have medals from that time of my life.  But like the Boss and most here say, that's the past, I want the future.  SE is good and my lucky ass found a new woman over a decade younger, loyal as hell, and stuck by me through this, never married and no kids, beautiful too.  And I think she can right a book on SE, and she doesn't even know what SE means.  Just how we roll if possible.  We learn and do.  We enjoy life, a little partying here and there, and looking forward to one massive celebration when this divorce ends.

I write this cause one, I can't shut up, but to say thank you to everyone.  Right here from my heart, thank you.  Also, to learn, and for others to learn, cause this has been the hardest thing I have ever done and dealt with.  And yes my ex has done everything to try and destroy my career and life.  If you have a significant other, obviously trust is huge, but keep your own finances.  Treat your other half well, don't play games, you want out, make the decision and go, move on in life.  Patience and hope, they are hard, but work.  Find happiness and put good people around you, even on the computer. There will be another day.

One other note, you can ask me anything you want, I will answer.  I will help if I can.  You ever need a, let's say, a report of some kind, like a Police Report, I can help with that, I'm a good writer, and will make sure you get what you need.

I appreciate the response to brother.  I will fight till it's right and just.  You want proof, not a prob.  Don't think I will just throw out my name, but we know there's ways to find out.  I'm not hiding anything either.

Peace and happiness to you all!  Hit me up for anything.

With the upmost respect and gratitude,

G

Welcome back man, seriously, I'd love an update from you.

[Boudica]

Glad to hear things are improving for you OP!

It sounds like hell to go through, but it sounds like you're taking some good steps to change your outcomes. Wish you the best of luck!