[Dinosaws]

Week #1 is now officially over! Week #2 will be here shortly along with the winner!

[Xeronations]

Week #1 is now officially over! Week #2 will be here shortly along with the winner!

When will the winner be announced?

[Adorapuff]

I think Xero won because mine sucked :/

[Xeronations]

WuTehFeh submitted an amazing piece. Won't be easy to compete with that!

[Dinosaws]

Warning, contains gore and a very sad ending. Do not read if you are easilly hurt by such things. This is not based upon a true story and is 100% fiction.

Spoiler:

Code:

The sound of snow on my roof. The thousands of footsteps colliding with it in a flurry of unique flakes of frozen goodness. That was all I could hear as I lay in my bed that cold winter night. I got up and pulled on a warm, green woollen jumper that I had received from my grandmother three days prior. I pulled myself up out of the warm depths of my bed to glimpse out of the window but, to my dismay, I couldn’t see a thing other than the peaceful white snow covering my window. I crept downstairs, being as quiet as the silence just before dawn. I quickly made a steaming mug of luscious hot chocolate with whipped cream and marshmallows on it. Then came the time for me to put my warm furry boots on and step outside into the unknown. The cold, that was what I felt first. The cold hurricane of snow bombarding my whole body and instantly turning me into a block of ice.
My steaming mug of hot chocolate was the only thing keeping me warm as the flurries of snow were hitting me. All of a sudden, over the vast mountain scape there was an orange light in the sky. Within a few minutes the warm sun was rising in the east of the vast scenery I could see before me. It was then I decided that the next day, me and my brother would go sledging.
Later that day, me and my younger brother, Sam, went out to go sledging down the nearby hills. When we got to the top of the first hill, we both looked at each other briefly, both smiling as to signal that we were ready. We placed our sledges down on the cold frozen ground, sat down on them and then pushed off. The exhilarating speed was amazing in the rapid rush down towards the bottom of the hill. In that brief moment, we were both free, we had not a single care in the world at that point. Then, suddenly, my brother’s sledge went out of control. He started rocketing towards the barbed wire fence at one side of the hill, away from the safe path we had walked up. The sledge kept going and there was no way of him stopping it. The red sledge slammed into the fence, Sam going with it. All I saw was a pool of blood and I could hear a terrifying shriek. The shriek wasn’t coming from my brother, it was coming from me. Sam’s head was impaled on the fence, blood pouring down his face. I quickly grabbed my mobile phone out of my pocket and immediately phoned 911.
They said that when the ambulance got there, he was already beyond their help, that he had already lost far too much blood to recover. They tried their best to bring him back but their attempts were to no avail. That one moment of freedom had cost so much. Never had I expected that something of this magnitude would happen. All I remember is my mother’s face, the crumpled mess covered in tears. It was my fault that Sam was dead, I had been the one to decide we were going sledging. I tried to comfort my mother but she was well and truly broken. When we got home I sat down on my bed, sat down and wept for my lost brother.

This was really good, pretty long also - however, the gore bit wasn't my sort of thing. Regardless to say I did still read it and it seems you've made a story rather than describe a place you know in the winter (if you know what I mean). HOWEVER, I am going to put in some points for your effort. This was a quality piece but I'd rather of had it as describing the city/town/village or whatever in the winter, not so much a story of events.

I stepped outside, but it wasn't cold. I felt a mild breeze, but like usual no snow. The sun glistened as I continued outside. I looked away, but to no avail. The sun is everywhere in Southern California. The breeze went away as I continued towards the shops. I felt a warmth, one of which bothered me. "I miss seasons," I said to myself. I don't know the last time I have seen percipitation.

Nice, but a little brief to be honest

^ Lol at that xD

Anyway here is mine, whipped it up in about a minute or so. It's focused more on the description and power of Mother Nature and the blizzard rain.

Spoiler:

Dark bruised clouds rumbled ominously across the blue sky, intimidating all those to bow before it or suffer the consequences of its wrath. However, directly beneath the menacing sky, lay a pure sheet of snow that could never cease to amaze me. It symbolised so much and yet so little if you did not look, and would always be there to defend the light and oppose the dark. As if Mother Nature intended war, a thunderous roar rumbled across the heavens followed by the immense crackle of jagged lights, like fireworks going haywire. The air was blizzard cold seeking ways through clothing and seeping through skin to bone. The wind howled and whipped itself across my face, mercilessly attempting to batter down a standing enemy. The trees waved in the raging wind, seeking a hold over its survival in this tyranny of weather. The air suddenly became dense and I knew what was to come next. The sky displayed another plethora of lightning which was exhibited towards all to see, before a pelting hail of rain fell to the ground. It was wave two. There was no sync in this rainfall, just waves after waves of Mother Nature. It was true then, that Mother Nature would never cease to amaze me.

This is really nice, I like the way you've described the majority of things. Especially "like fireworks going haywire" - this line just made me laugh, but it's a good attempt and I think you've managed to put up a strong bit of work here.

My submission is below. It is a total of 341 characters, excluding spaces.

As I walk towards it, I feel the numbness in my toes. The knee deep snow hindering me, but not so that I cannot reach it. And finally, I arrive. As I gaze upon it, my heart skips a beat. Bathed in soft moonlight lies a giant Oak. With gnarled, rough branches it reaches for the stars. Leaves dry and withered, it weeps in silence. The air is still. Oh so still. There are no trees around it. Just one Oak. One, lonely Oak.

Hopefully, I will be able to do a few edits before the end of the contest. Good luck to all other participants!

Nice, I can imagine it fairly easy - however, a little tip I'd suggest would be not to use 'As I' at the start of the paragraph. It makes it too generic and like a story for it too be all that effective, but it's a good bit of description and I like the words you've used.

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Results

#1 - WuhTehFuh - Focus on making it less of a story and set the scene.
#2 - Ultimatum
#3 - Xeronations
#4 - Devil Child

Although you might appear to not have one, I am going to change the way you win next week to points based. This will work by me giving points for a bit of writing and you'll get AP for the amount of points you've earn't, so everyone will be able to get some AP.

Now, all 4 were imaginative - but these are what I am going to stage them as! Next week you'll all of earn't some AP

Good luck next time!

[Xeronations]

Thanks for the constructive criticism. You're right. The moment I say "As I", it makes the story sound amateurish and typical. I hope to do better on the next one. Keep the contests going!

[Dinosaws]

Will do, right now I am completely dull of ideas to make my 'minions' write about. I am thinking that if I win this lottery next week (2,500 AP right now) then I'll do something for a holiday special.

[TechSaavy]

Great idea! I don't have time though to join this contest.. maybe later

[Ultimatum]

Hmm, I guess, I'm missing a story and too much of a set scene? And WuhTehFuh just lacks what I have, and I lack what he has?

[Dinosaws]

Hmm, I guess, I'm missing a story and too much of a set scene? And WuhTehFuh just lacks what I have, and I lack what he has?

I guess you can put it that way, regardless - next week everyone's hopefully going to get some AP points.