[Dismas]

Nobody is going to say slowly or painfully. Unexpectedly is probably preferable, too.

I want to live to about 80, then I'm going to dig a hole under a nice tree, place the dirt in a tarp, tie up the tarp with the rope over a branch. With the tarp of dirt over the hole I will get into the hole with the other end of the rope tied to a handgun, I will then shoot my brains out and as my dead hand releases the gun the tarp drops the dirt into the hole. That way I can save someone else the effort of burying my corpse,

That's an elaborate plan. Age expectancy might go up, you might enjoy being 80. What then?