Quote:Ugh, look, I know he was revived by a god or whatever, and he’s got lightning powers and what-not, but I’m still pissed that I woke up early for work today and now I’m in half and sailing off a cliff into a ravine. I mean, I’M not the evil King Vandheer. Sure, I like, went to some rallies, and I actually probably would have voted for him if he hadn’t taken power for himself, but I’m only trained so well, you know? It grinds my gears that this guy can just waltz in here and cut me in half. I thought I was on the cool team!
But what are you gonna do? And hey, at least I didn’t go down like Dave. At least the hero of the Black Mist had the decency to come up here and finish me off himself. Dave was just chillin, last day on the job after six years in Vandheer’s army, and then one afternoon this guy’s Eagle friend shows up, drops a bag on a switch, and then BOOM! No more Dave.
And I mean, honestly, is Vandheer’s reign REALLY all that bad? Sure we’re all starving to death and we mostly just stand around guarding empty shit, but at least Vandheer’s not trying to kill us all anymore, right? All that being revived by the gods and swearing vengeance on the king seems like too much of a to-do for a rationally-minded man like myself. Ah, well. Guess that’s why I’m just a henchman and he’s Armed with Wi-oh yeah, the floor. Ow.